The Happy Pear Podcast

Toxic Masculinity with Darragh Stewart

Men’s circles, intimacy, sex, relationships, masculinity, vulnerability, mental health, psychedelics, meditation and more… this week we talk to Dr. Darragh Stewart, an international wellness retreat facilitator, psychedelic speaker and Men's Mentor. “Men’s circles are about being seen and heard… being able to be vulnerable without the need for 10 to 15 pints. It is a beautiful space for growth and connection.” Darragh Co-founded Inwardbound, one of the world's first pioneering safe and legal psychedelic retreats in the Netherlands. He specialises in men’s sexuality and intimacy development, psychedelic science and spirituality. Thanks in part to his Molecular Genetics Ph.d. - Darragh’s main interest lies in bridging the gap between science and spirituality. Having held men’s circles, retreats and workshops in Ireland since 2018, Darragh has a grounded approach to exploring spirituality: creating safe spaces for people to go deep inwards and to connect to what resonates for them without dogma or judgement. “When I went on my own personal journey there was only women in these kinds of spaces but now we are starting to see change… predominantly due to the increase in mental health issues seen amongst men” An important conversation that we hope will inspire more men to open up, show their vulnerability and express themselves in their own authentic way. Big love, Dave & Steve x See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

November 30, 2021

63 min

Ethical Porn with Erotic Filmmaker Erika Lust

Apparently, 35% of internet downloads involve porn and 50% of UK adults watch porn, according to the Guardian. Something so popular and yet never talked about - why don’t half of us openly admit to each other (or to ourselves) that “yes, I watch porn”? "For most people, porn is what they find on these free online sites and often very misogynistic, aggressive, even racist and not tasteful.” For this week’s podcast guest, Indie erotic filmmaker, Erika Lust, argues that porn can be so much more than that: “I really think we have a possibility here of creating wonderful, beautiful, and diverse films… I think there is a lot of positivity around watching people have great sex together and seeing how they are communicating, especially in a world that struggles with the language of consent.” We admit we were a bit nervous going into the conversation, but we instantly sank right in and found ourselves viewing porn from a new lense. Erika Lust is an award-winning filmmaker who creates sex-positive adult cinema by portraying relatable characters, realistic sex, and offering a more inclusive and cinematic alternative to the mass produced mainstream porn. Over the past 20 years, Erika has defended the importance of having women, BIPOC, and LGBTQ+ people behind the camera in all key positions and supports burgeoning talent across the globe by producing and financing female and queer guest directors. “More and more youth are turning to porn for sex education, whether we like it or not,” says Erika. According to the Guardian, “teenagers are turning to porn as a sex educational tool because schools do not tell them what to do, but focus only on contraception”. “Young women are constantly coming up to me saying “I am having sexual relations with men and I can’t orgasm, what’s wrong with me?” Many times it is because they are learning about sex through what they see online and they think that is how it should be done - that kind of sex is not stimulating for women.” From how historically affluent white men made sexual entertainment something only for themselves, to how porn is now run by one dominant company posing as a tech company, this episode with Erika is truly fascinating. We hope you found it as eye-opening as we did! Big love, Dave & Steve x You can find out more about Erika and her work on her website erikalust.com , on instagram @erikalust and checkout her latest short film out tomorrow, Cooking show on xconfessions.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

November 23, 2021

59 min

Ethical Non Monogamy & Sex Positivity with Sexpert Zachary Zane

If ever there was an educational episode on this podcast this one is it. Zachary breaks it all down for us, from the multiple labels in modern society to jealousy and safety within ethical non monogamous relationships. “If you look at the studies and stats, we are seeing more and more people who are interested in non monogamy or engaging in non monogamy in some form. We are also the gayest or queerest generation! More and more people identifying as gay bisexual, transgender, non binary than ever before.” A Brooklyn-based columnist and activist, Zachary’s work focuses on sexuality, culture, and the LGBTQ community. You can read his popular sex advice column, “Sexplainit” at Men's Health, ” but his work has also been published in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, The Washington Post, GQ, Cosmo, and many others. To be honest, we felt pretty ignorant throughout most of this episode, but Zachary proved to be a patient teacher and a good laugh. After he brought us through the meaning of the various sexual identifying labels, we discussed his sex column, fetishes, his personal life and his backstory. A truly open minded and open human being, we really enjoyed this conversation and hope it, too! Lots of Love Dave & Steve To find out more about Zachary you can find him on instagram @zacharyzane_ See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

November 16, 2021

67 min

A Happy Perimenopause, is it a myth?

Despite feeling like clueless school kids throughout, this week’s episode was another reminder of just how grateful we are to host this podcast and that women’s issues are also men’s issues! “One in four women leave their workplaces or go part time because they have lost confidence, so society does need to take note of menopause.” Dr Shahzadi Harper is a medical doctor with a holistic approach to women’s health and wellbeing. She is a leading light in the world of perimenopause & menopause and has recently co-authored and published a book called The Perimenopause Solution. A forward-thinking and dynamic doctor with over 25 years of experience, Dr Shahzadi is passionate about advocating for positive change and a better understanding of perimenopause/menopause by optimising the way it is perceived. Dr Shahzadi believes that women from all backgrounds and ethnicities should feel empowered in life and that all men should be educated about how to support them. Aside from societal ignorance, we talk libido, HRT, supplements, societal pressures and more… An important conversation, that we hope will encourage you to also have more openly. If you enjoyed it please like, subscribe, leave a review and share! Lots of love, Dave & Steve To find out more about Dr Shahzadi; checkout her instagram @drshahzadiharper @theharperclinic , her website https://theharperclinic.com/ and of course her new book: The Perimenopause Solution See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

November 9, 2021

57 min

Sexual Therapy with Dr Kate Balestrieri

Why can’t we talk to our kids about sex? “Sexual negativity is the lense most of us are born into… we are fed shame”, we are made think it should be a “secretive thing”, we allow judgment and scrutiny of others. With this in mind how are we equipped to speak to the younger generation about it - How can we be sure we are passing down a healthy relationship towards sex? The big question being; is our own inability to speak openly about sex pushing our children towards porn for their sex education? This week we speak to the amazing Dr Kate Balestrieri, a Licensed Psychologist, Certified Sex Therapist, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, PACT Therapist and Founder of Modern Intimacy. Dr Kate came into her practice through her involvement with sex offenders. She began to see a pattern amongst these offenders and the therapists allocated to them and felt she needed to delve deeper. Her out look is one of compassion, open mindedness, and honesty. She gives many practical tips on nurturing a healthy sex life. We talk in length about so many things including safety, curiosity and diversity. As she puts it; “humans are diverse so why would our sex lives be any different” An insightful listen. We hope you enjoy it as much as we did! Big Love, Dave & Steve x You can find out more about Dr Kate from her IG @drkatebalestrieri and her podcast, Modern Intimacy. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

November 2, 2021

64 min

Sexual Longevity with Dr. Amy Killen

Sexual longevity - How do we keep going? When Amy asked her mum at the age of 11, “mum what’s a virgin?”, her mother responded “it’s someone who is not married”. Fast forward 20 years, Amy is now a trained and highly sought after Doctor in Sexual Health, Anti-Aging and Regenerative Medicine in aesthetics and sexual optimisation. How did this week’s podcast guest go from a sexually repressive religious background to dedicating much of her life’s work to promoting a long and healthy sex life? “Sexual health is more like a gateway to other underlying issues. When people come to me about their sexual health, it’s rarely an issue with their genitalia. It’s usually something else like hormonal problem, cardiovascular problem, stress, diet…” After years of working on the medical ward, Amy soon began to see a rise in patience being more and more interested in their skin and their sex lives. So she took the plunge! We talk stem cells, nitric oxide, PRP, hormone replacement, nutrition, fitness, how she deals with the topic sex and her own children… we cover it all! A fascinating conversation! Enjoy! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

October 26, 2021

65 min

Sex & Pleasure with Jenny Keane

Is sex a skill? How do we get better at sex if we don’t talk about sex?! This week’s electric guest is the wonderful Jenny Keane. Jenny is a professionally trained, trauma informed, holistic sex educator and Tantra yoga teacher. A crusader for self love through self exploration and pleasure, Jenny is on a mission to ignite a sexual revolution in Ireland! “If you want to change the way that you live, change the way that you have sex… Because the way that you show up in bed is more than likely the way you show up in life.” A fascinating conversation, that has no boundaries; Jenny takes us through the menstruation difficulties that first brought her down this journey of sexual education; how the contraceptive pill changed her libido and even her sense of smell. We explore how in today’s society we are programmed to put unrealistic expectations on ourselves: sex has become a "performance or obligation”. Finally, we dive deep into how “to live erotically is to live in tune with your body” As Jenny puts it, “there is no recipe for pleasure”. We are all on our own unique discovery and should not shy away from it. Rather, we should educate ourselves and our children so that they grow up with a healthy understanding of their own bodies and its abilities. So let’s all try and take some advice from Jenny, Ireland’s sexual revolutionary, and slow down, remove the goal, pay attention, learn to connect with our breathe, body and mind; and most importantly have the right mindset! As “all tips are useless if you don’t have the right mindset first”. We hope you enjoyed this episode as much as we did, we will be continuing this season with more topics all related to sex and relationships, so stay tuned! Please subscribe and share if you like what you hear. Lots of love, Dave & Steve To find out more about Jenny and her work, check out her site www.jennykeane.com and instagram page @hellojennykeane See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

October 19, 2021

75 min

Simon Hill on The Proof is in the Plants

What if nutritional information was simple and accessible so that people can make informed decisions about the food they feed themselves and their family? Well, Simon Hill has dedicated a decade to doing just that. Through podcast and website, plant proof, Simon has given a platform to world-renowned doctors and public figures. During this chat, we learned what happens to the health outcomes of identical twins when they change lifestyles, the potential connection between diabetic dog and diabetic dog owners. Simon also bravely shared the role that a traumatic family incident kickstarted his interest in fighting chronic disease. This episode is for people who like data, academic studies and want to use evidence based science to make decisions about their health. Lots of insightful anecdotes so grab a pen and notepad! To find out more about Simon and his work checkout, Plant Proof Podcast and his book, The Proof is in the Plants See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

October 12, 2021

68 min

About the podcast The Happy Pear Podcast

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