You are in for a TREAT with this episode, which truly felt like a therapy session for me. I sat down with Thais Gibson who has over a decade working as a practitioner and specializes in blending attachment theory, psychology, and subconscious reprogramming.  We discuss what Thais refers to as the “relationship shadow” and explore why our partners can be so dang triggering (it’s not what you think!) and how to navigate these triggers more mindfully. For more about Thais, check out: Website: https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ThePersonalDevelopmentSchool Learning Love book: https://attachment.personaldevelopmentschool.com/learning-love Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepersonaldevelopmentschool/ — Additional resources: Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here! (instant + lifetime access) Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt like you were not going “fast enough” in your journey to heal relationship anxiety or ROCD? Maybe you’ve seen other people share their wins and felt like you’re just not getting it. It’s easy to beat ourselves up when we compare to other people’s highlight reels–but today I am peeling back the curtain of what healing relationship anxiety actually looks like.  Get the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit here!  — Montage Fallacy article by Herbert Lui Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

If you are the partner of someone with relationship anxiety, this episode is for you. If you have relationship anxiety and want to be able to ask your partner for more intentional support, this episode is for you! Thank you to the help of the You Love and You Learn community on Instagram for this episode. I received dozens of answers to the question “how does your partner help you navigate relationship anxiety?” to influence this episode. I cover: How to help a partner with relationship anxiety What to say and what not to say when they’re in an anxiety spike Setting boundaries to protect your own energy  Is giving reassurance helpful, or not? …and more PS–the Relationship Anxiety Toolkit is LIVE! You can get it here. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

If you have ever felt like your healthy relationship is boring and the “vibes are off” – this episode is for you! I sat down with Dr. Morgan Anderson, a clinical psychologist, relationship coach, and host of the “Let’s Get Vulnerable” podcast.  In this episode we discuss: Why Morgan rejected, sabotaged, and avoided available love for so long What emotional availability looks like  What happens when we prioritize vibes, spark, chemistry 3 reasons why we sabotage healthy relationships …and more. For more of Morgan’s work, check out: Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmorgancoaching/ Her free resource: Www.drmorgancoaching.com/gift — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I loved this conversation because time and time again this comes up in the work I do with clients (and it was a pattern in my own relationship). I sat down with Charisse Cooke, who is a London-based relationship psychotherapist with over 20 years experience. She helps individuals, couples and groups develop relationship skills and define love in a way that has meaning for them.  In this episode we discuss: what love addiction is and how we can take the thrill of the chase to extremes what happens when we put our partner on a pedestal and have an idealized version of them the question “do I love them, or am I just attached?” what love is and what love isn’t so we can be more mindful how our expectations and past traumas create certain patterns on our relationship …and more. For more of Charisse’s work, check out: Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/charissecooke/ Her website: www.charissecooke.com — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Do you ever notice yourself feeling good, then suddenly an anxious voice pops up saying “wait, shouldn’t I be worrying about something?” or “if I don’t worry about this–how will I figure it out?” I’ve been here, and I used to sabotage most of my good feelings by jumping straight back into worry. In this episode, I explore: Why fear can try to block us from experiencing joy What patterns to look for (worry withdrawals, resistance) How to respond to these patterns differently and widen your tolerance for joy  PS–be sure to join my Instagram broadcast channel lovin’ and learnin’ for the latest updates on a new exciting offering I have coming soon.  — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I share my personal journey from getting engaged (June 2023) to planning my wedding (in May 2025). Thanks to great questions from the You Love and You Learn community…I discuss: How to enjoy your engagement phase before and during wedding planning What I’ve learned about my personality during this time  How to accept the moments when you felt stressed or overwhelmed by the planning / decisions  How to make decisions about the wedding itself without worrying there is a better option out there that would make you happier on the day  How not to get overwhelmed at the thought of spending forever with someone  — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

You asked…we’re answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our significant other’s families, and we’re answering the questions in a two-part episode. Today’s episode is all about navigating relational dynamics with our partner’s family. Should we set boundaries with our partner’s family? Should they? How to navigate with family’s criticism? How to create connection with in-laws?    We explore all of these topics and how to respond to them more mindfully.  For more of Alexandra’s work, check out: Her Instagram Her YouTube — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

You asked…we’re answering! Alexandra Schelling (of @toolboxforlove on Instagram) and I polled our communities for questions about navigating our significant other’s families, and we’re answering the questions in a two-part episode. Today’s episode is all about what’s happening in our OWN mind when it relates to our partner’s family. Expectation vs. reality (and the anxiety that causes), insecurities when we compare to other people’s relationships with their in-laws, and feeling triggered by specific interactions.  We explore all of these topics and how to respond to them more mindfully. Stay tuned next week for part two about setting boundaries with in-laws! For more of Alexandra’s work, check out: Her Instagram Her YouTube — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

his episode is a long-time coming, one I have been so excited to record and share with you because I wish more people knew this information! Menstrual cycles can have such a huge effect on how we’re showing up throughout the month, and if we don’t know what to expect…we can feel a lil’ crazy or guilty about the changes in energy, mindset, and emotions.  So I brought Ash McDonald, Therapeutic Business and Life Mentor, on the show who is someone that went through her own journey with cycle syncing after feeling burnt out during her third pregnancy and having hope that there was a better way to live her life and show up for her loved ones.  For more of Ash’s work and the Flow Lab course she mentioned in the episode: FLOW LAB LINK SHAMELESSLY AMBITIOUS PODCAST WEBSITE — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

I was pleasantly surprised when I listened to a podcast with James Sexton, a divorce lawyer who’s seen the ups and downs of couples for 25+ years in his career and has a lot of wisdom to share from it.  Today’s episode focuses on a key thing he sees that leads to relationship breakdown: 1. Not knowing what you want or need, and 2. Not knowing how to express what you want or need. I explore different categories that it can be helpful to explore your needs in, two book recommendations to help you get started, and tips for HOW to communicate needs in a helpful way. If you want to explore this more in private coaching… Sign up here. If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. Books mentioned in the episode: Eight Dates by John and Julie Gottman Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson *Amazon affiliate links — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This simple reframe has helped me (and dozens of my clients) in moments of relationship anxiety: zooming in when you’re thinking too big-picture, and zooming out when you’re hyper-fixated on something in the present moment. I explain why this matters in your relationship and specific examples of zooming in and out to help manage your anxiety. If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

This topic is LONG overdue, and that is feeling unworthy and how this affects our life and the ways we show up in our relationships. I’m thrilled to have had the chance to speak with Sarah Baldwin, who is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and expert in the field of trauma resolution.  We explore reasons we feel unworthy, how to become kinder to ourselves, how to reconnect with our body if we’ve been stuck up in the mind our whole life, what it means to be connected to your ‘truth,’ and more.  For more of Sarah’s work: https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/worktogether — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Are you clear about what your needs are in a relationship? If so, do you communicate them openly with your partner?  If you answered no to either question, you’ll enjoy this conversation. Our partners cannot read our minds, especially if we are not even sure what we’re expecting in the first place, so it’s important to take time to think about these things. To explore this, I chatted with Gayane Aramyan, a marriage and family therapist who specializes in perinatal mental health support for women and couples. She’s been with her husband for 15 years and has learned a lot along the way of how to continue to speak up for your needs (and clear out resentments) through lifes’ transitions (including becoming parents). For more of Gayane’s work: https://www.therapywithgayane.com/ https://www.instagram.com/therapywithgayane/ — If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Common questions I am asked are “what if I never had a honeymoon phase?” and “is it bad if I’ve had relationship anxiety/ROCD from the beginning of my relationship?”  My two cents is how long we’ve had RA/ROCD is less relevant than what is contributing to the RA/ROCD…and that’s exactly what I explore in this episode! What factors may have contributed to RA/ROCD being there from the beginning, and how to move forward if this is your experience. If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Have you ever felt bored in your relationship and worried that something is wrong? Maybe you’ve wondered “is this normal, shouldn’t things feel more exciting than this?” I’ve been there, and this has been a trigger I have struggled with myself, so I wanted to explore it more.  In this episode, I explore: 3 reasons why healthy love can feel boring What inner work you can do if you feel disappointed by boredom What actions you can take in your relationship if you feel bored  If you’re loving the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

It can be so hard to trust ourselves when there is so much relationship information and advice out there. Even well-meaning friends and family can add their two cents when sometimes, we really didn’t need it! In this episode, I sat down with a client of mine who shares her journey of trusting her intuition in her first serious relationship. We also explore the fear of being attracted to other people and how to discern if you should listen to other people’s advice. To get access to the “Is it Anxiety, or Intuition?” webinar that’s mentioned in the episode… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

Today we’re diving into something that has a big impact on our overall mental health and wellbeing; our vagus nerve. Amanda Armstrong, neuroscience and trauma-informed anxiety & depression coach (and now AUTHOR!) is back on the podcast to help walk us through how to improve our mental health by working with our vagus nerve - the nerve that connects our brain and body, and regulates our nervous system. Amanda has so much wisdom to share (check out episode 50 in case you have not heard that one yet) and I was very excited to bring her back for another conversation. To order Healing the Vagus Nerve book and dive more into Amanda’s world: Order Healing the Vagus Nerve on Amazon (here) Website: https://www.riseaswe.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandaontherise/?hl=en — If you’re enjoying the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

In this episode, I address advice like “a relationship should feel mostly positive / easy / joyful in order to be worth it”, and “if the balance swings negative or if the association is that the relationship is difficult or complex then it’s a red flag.” If you’ve ever wondered “shouldn’t this be easier?” – this episode is for you! The article I mentioned in the podcast is here: https://www.lionsroar.com/intimate-relationship-as-a-spiritual-crucible/ — If you’re enjoying the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram

There is so much to learn from the Gottman Method of therapy, which is based on 40+ years of relationship research thanks to the work of John and Julie Gottman. I wanted to discuss how we can apply some of these key lessons to build better relationship habits, and was grateful to have a conversation with Anna Aslanian, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who’s a certified Gottman Method therapist.  For more about Anna, check out: https://www.instagram.com/mytherapycorner/ https://mytherapycorner.com/ https://www.gottman.com/author/anna-aslanian-lmft/ — If you’re enjoying the podcast… JOIN THE YOU LOVE AND YOU LEARN PATREON COMMUNITY FOR $7/month. — Additional resources: Join Deconstruct the Doubts digital course here (instant + lifetime access) Click here to join the waitlist for the next cohort of Beyond the Doubts group coaching Download the free video training: The Single Most Important Lesson in Healing Relationship Anxiety Visit my website Connect with me on Instagram